General Chaos

The Dremel Killer

So, I got this nice little toy the other day, and I went and destroyed it. Not the new van, no–I’m talking about my Dremel.

The new van was sort of the cause, though. See, there’s this fence across the back of my yard…well, “fence” isn’t really the word, unless when you hear the word you think of chain link lashed to a framework of 3″ steel pipes secured with an excessive amount of concrete. It’s more like a tank trap, or some insane plumber’s apprentice’s idea of installation art than a fence.

And it’s a hazard to navigation. About all it does successfully is gouge the side panels of cars making too wide a turn into our car park, and keep the garbage truck from running over the rats who’ve dug in just behind a curb that could stop alpha, beta, and gamma radiation. It would take a bunker buster to get them out of there.

So, I decided for the safety of my new ride to take the monstrosity down. But what tool to use? My hacksaw broke while I was making a first attempt at cutting it off. So I tried the cutoff wheel on the Dremel. It barely nicked the surface.

Next came the jigsaw attachment for the Dremel, with a metal-cutting blade. It was working great, until the Dremel BURST INTO FIRE IN MY HANDS.

Needless to say, I don’t think that’s covered under the limited warranty.